Pesky Squirrels Only Thing Responsible For Maintaining Neighbor's Friendship
Local Neighbors Tim Nosbaum and Shane Finton share a special friendship that has lasted ten years. Unlike most friendships built on layers of comradery, trust, and a mutual enjoyment of each other's company, Tim and Shane have maintained years of friendship solely due to a shared hatred of the neighborhood squirrels.
"I didn't care much for Shane when I first met him." Said 61 year old Tim Nosbaum. "We just didn't see eye to eye on most things. I'm a Cubs fan; He's a White Sox fan. I'm a little bit country; He's a little bit rock 'n roll. I'm a Satanist; He's an Episcopalian." However, after years of awkward greetings and half-assed nods acknowledging each other's presence, Tim and Shane discovered a topic that would create an unbreakable bond: the pesky neighborhood squirrels.
"Those little fuckers are always in my garden eating my prized squash and cucumbers! One day I mentioned it to Tim and then we erupted into three hours of uninterrupted squirrel hate speech." Exclaimed 43 year old Shane Finton. "My fondest memory of our friendship has to be the time that I ran over a huge squirrel coming home from work. I picked up the fresh carcass and ran like a schoolboy to show Tim."
Tim recalled the occasion with a grin and a sparkle in his eye. "Shane ran half a mile to show me that squashed bastard. Poor guy was completely out of breathe when he got to me. Then we decided to hang it in Shane's garden with a sign that said, "Squirrels ye be warned!' We had a pretty big laugh about it in my hot tub later that night. Wow, what a magical summer."